Your highest calling will be the hardest

This is a funny story. I felt like the Lord said I must take a break from writing, this isn’t unusual for me as the Lord often says stop xyz in order to do a bit of a heart recon. hehe!

Never fun these heart recon’s, especially for me, there’s always a sprinkle of vanity and a twinge of conviction that causes me to fall on my knees and ask Father for forgiveness for vanity, self-imposed haughtiness of the eyes, heart and mind… wow… I was in deep and were it not for my Saviour, I’d still be in that place. You see He promises to catch me where I fall, question I have to ask myself is, am I listening when He wants to be there to catch me… what, and to whom am I listening…

I found that I quickly get misdirected of the voices out there, this piece was great, what you wrote about the other day I don’t agree with… at times even the silence of the reader makes it hard to know what they think and feel about what I’m writing, the direction my devotions are taking etc..

Anyway, the Lord told me to wait from 15 August, 2020, till 15 September, 2020 for an answer to something else I wanted to do. The Lord said wait a month and I will answer you. I said ok, took a look at the calendar, it was the 15th August and I prayed very oddly in between about the circumstance and I heard nothing from the Lord regarding my question.

Today, in my quiet time I felt the Lord speak so clearly to me, I was very moved by His message and the fact that I’d heard so directly, where I’d felt the last few weeks were very quiet and I hadn’t heard anything so very directly from the Lord. Only later in the day, I would realise it was the 15th of September, and realise the significance of what the Lord had done!

He had said you will know the answer on 15 September, and here I was just having usual time with the Lord, not asking Him specifically about my query and He answered me.

What is my point and why am I mentioning this here? The Lord doesn’t answer us as and when we would like and within the parameters we set for Him. I should have known by now that the Lord would tell me when He felt it was the right time to answer, after all in our relationship I don’t wake up and tell the Lord, ok today I’ll fast for abc for x amount of time and y subject will be fasted. No.

I say, Lord, I feel led to fast today or this week etc, please let me know the hours and the things You want me to fast. Taking it from there, I find the Lord is much kinder to me than I am to myself.